Pig Iron

Before I die, there are two more drinks I'd like to try: a hot cup of coffee and a cold glass of tea.

Galdarn, Son of a Wench!

I just LOVE movies that have been edited for television. Tonight (on the Family Channel no less) my generation's favorite flick The Breakfast Club is on tap. Not that I expect them to allow the vulgarity and mild sexual content of the original, but I would rather they not even show it then insert those ridiculous sounding pseudo-curse words.

You have a problem with that? Flip you!

My all time favorite is from a movie that I cannot even remember. Our protagonist was in such shock and disbelief that he was led to exclaim: "Cheese and rice! Cheese and rice almighty!". In my opinion, the good Lord would more offended at that foul mix of food staples that his name being taken in vain. Would anyone really sit down to a big bowl of cheese and rice?

Since CNN is not going to bring it up..

If Bush is dumb ... ?

© 2005 Laurence A. Elder

"Does anyone in America doubt," said former New York Times executive editor Howell Raines before the 2004 presidential election, "that [presidential candidate Sen. John] Kerry has a higher IQ than [President George W.] Bush? I'm sure the candidates' SATs and college transcripts would put Kerry far ahead."

And, on March 6, 2004, a New York Times article called the way Kerry thinks through problems "the mark of an intellectual who grasps the subtleties of issues, inhabits their nuances and revels in the deliberative process." The Los Angeles Times dismissed Bush's achievements, and editorialized that he became president only as a result of an "accident of birth and corruption of democracy."

Get it? See, Bush is a dunderhead, while Kerry positioned himself as the thinking man's alternative. Really?

After promising during the campaign and then refusing to do so, Kerry finally signed Form 180, which authorized the military to release all of his records. (One of the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth, John O'Neill, says the records are incomplete and mysteries still remain.) The recently released records appear to back up Kerry's account of his activities and injuries in Vietnam.

Why, then, didn't Kerry release his records during the campaign? After all, his refusal seemed like a cover-up. Now we know.

Kerry's military records also include his college grades. (The New Yorker printed Bush's grades in 1999, but Kerry consistently refused to release his.) It turns out that "dummy" and fellow Yalie George W. Bush made better grades than did brainy, intellectual John Kerry. Under Yale's grading system at the time Bush and Kerry attended, grades from 90 to 100 meant an A, 80 to 89 a B, 70 to 79 a C, and 60 to 69 a D. Kerry received five Ds, including four in his freshman year, with a D in political science! Bush, during his time at Yale, got one D, in astronomy. Overall, Kerry finished Yale with a cumulative score of 76. Bush finished with a score of 77. So who's the dummy?

Retired history professor Gaddis Smith taught both students, but only recalls Kerry. Smith remembered Kerry as a "good student." When informed, however, that Kerry received a 71 and 79 in Smith's history courses, the professor said, "Uh, oh. I thought he was [a] good student. Those aren't very good grades." Oh, what did the forgettable Bush get in history? 88.

Kerry and the Democrats clearly considered Bush stupid. During the campaign, when Bush injured himself by falling off his bicycle, Kerry snidely said, "Did the training wheels fall off?" And on 2004 election night, as the returns came in, a dejected Kerry said, "I can't believe I'm losing to this idiot."

What did some in the mainstream media make out of Kerry's now-released records?

A Boston Globe article began, "During last year's presidential campaign, John F. Kerry was the candidate often portrayed as intellectual and complex, while George W. Bush was the populist who mangled his sentences. But newly released records show that Bush and Kerry had a virtually identical grade average at Yale University four decades ago." The New York Times, too, ran a piece – on page 10 – about Kerry's grades. The Los Angeles Times, however, ran a page A-17 story, only about how Kerry's records refute allegations made by the Swift Boat Veterans. Not one word was printed about Kerry's grades! "The long-awaited documents," said the Los Angeles Times, "contained no bombshells ..." No bombshells?

A week after Kerry's grades were released, a Fox News poll found that only 27 percent of likely voters (about one in four) believed Bush had better grades in college, while 43 percent still believed Kerry had better grades. Does the contained-no-bombshells media play a role in voters' ignorance of current events?

Bush also performed better than Kerry on military intelligence tests. This came out during the presidential campaign. When Tom Brokaw told Kerry that Bush scored higher, the senator sniffed that, the night before the exam, he "must have been drinking."

After repeatedly implying that Bush lacked the intellectual goods, how could Sen. Kerry release his transcripts during the campaign? After all, what looks worse? A "brainy" intellectual who underperforms? Or the "dunce" who manages to outperform the "genius"?

In fact, Bush himself jokes about his mediocre grades. At the 2001 Yale commencement ceremony, the president said, "To those of you who received honors, awards and distinctions, I say, well done. And to the C students – I say, you, too, can be president of the United States." Can we expect similar self-deprecating humor from Kerry?

For what it's worth, Thomas Stanley, author of "The Millionaire Mind," says that most millionaires come from the ranks of B and C students. Their success comes from the "people skills" to manage, lead and inspire. That sounds like poor George W. He got elected and re-elected governor of Texas. And then elected and re-elected president of the United States.

Not bad ... for a "dummy."

Insane Illegals

On the news today, I saw that a group of ILLEGAL ALIENS have gotten together and are demanding low-cost (or free) higher education. Why wasn't INS there rounding up these people and shipping them back to their own countries? Why is this even news? Why isn't this laughed at? Why aren't these people mocked and told to get a life?

Let's see.. an American citizen from Arizona cannot come to school in California because of the high price of out of state tuition. But somebody, somewhere is considering give free eduction to people WHO ARE HERE ILLEGALLY?! These fools at the rally were demanding Federal action and that their voices be heard.

Illegal alien sympathizers have taken over the State legislature and they have taken over the Los Angeles city government.

This state is in deep-do-do my friends.

Words Mean Things..

Main Entry: request
Function: transitive verb
1 : to make a request to or of
2 : to ask as a favor or privilege

Main Entry: expect
Pronunciation: ik-'spekt
Function: verb

transitive senses
2 : to anticipate or look forward to the coming or occurrence of

Please notice how using these words interchangably can completely change the meaning of a sentence:

1. She requests that we get together Saturday night.
2. She expects us to get together Saturday night.

Accuracy is very important.

Peeitits

Yesterday, I had peeitis. I had what? Peeitis.

Peeitis. My mom coined that phrase when I was in elementary school. Some days I had to frequently urinate. We went to the doctor and discovered that nothing was wrong with me (go figure). Since the doctor could not put a medical tag on my "condition", around the Ledbetter houshold it became known as 'peeitis'.

20+ years later, that phrase is alive and well in American society. On more than one occasion, I have heard Jaclyn mention that she has 'peeitis' after drinking a cup of tea. When I have too much coffee in the afternoon, I develop a case of 'peeitis'.

So let's hear it for Dr. Doris Ledbetter! If not for her outstanding research in the areas of frequent urination, we may all still be living in the dark ages and using leeches for blood transfusions.

The Rise of the Disdainful Democrats

This was too good to merely link to, so here it is in full text:

The rise of the disdainful Democrats
June 21st, 2005

Senator Robert Byrd's previous occupation as a butcher never seems to come up when the press describes his history. It seems that mundane occupational histories of politicians matter only when they are Republicans. This is a method employed by the liberal media to demean Republicans, implicitly characterizing them as being made of "lesser stuff" and to disparage their intellectual abilities.

For example, Speaker of the House Dennis Hastert's career as a wrestling coach is routinely brought up, since jocks are probably a lesser caste in the Washington D.C. pecking order. That his well-honed talent for inspiring his troops and creating a sense of teamwork are skills undoubtedly enhanced by his teaching history matters not at all. The media similarly depicts Majority Leader Tom DeLay as a former exterminator. His nickname, the Hammer, subtly implies a view of him as a destroyer, and this merits frequent mention.

In ways both subtle and overt, the Democrats and their press allies hold up as objects of derision those Republicans who have actually worked with their hands, or even those who plied their skills in professions which do not require a graduate degree. The American dream of self-starters rising to prominence is part of the legendary appeal of America. But the media refuse to celebrate these stories as worthy of emulation when they are accomplished by Republicans.

The most offensive aspect of the Democratic disdain for the common man is exemplified by their abhorrence of soldiers. While these men and women defend our shores and protect us from terrorism, they are routinely slandered by Democratic politicians eager to use the wayward actions of a few to indict all soldiers. The New York Times, the house organ of the Democratic Party, has always portrayed volunteers going into the military as dead-enders-people who have no hope of getting into or finishing college and are unemployables who have no way to earn a living other than joining our military. The condescension is overwhelming.

Howard Dean’s recent condemnation of Republicans as people who "have never made an honest living in their lives" simply is out of touch with reality. Au contraire, Monsieur Dean, for your characterization seems to apply far more readily to Democratic leaders than to Republicans.

Teddy Kennedy is a proto-typical trust fund baby: a man who would not be a senator, or a leader of any sort, but for his father's ill-gotten gains and any sheen that rubbed off him as the brother of two slain American legends. After all, Kennedy cheated on Harvard exams and has had a less than stellar history when it comes to his romantic life and driving skills, and much-rumored problems involving his sobriety.

Nancy Pelosi and Senator Feinstein have family wealth derived from husbands who engage in the very behavior often condemned by liberals: venture capital and LBO financing. Tom Harkin lied about his Vietnam war experience. Joe Biden cheated in school and plagiarized in order to draft his speeches. John Edwards used junk science to accumulate a fortune. Star Democratic Senator Hillary Clinton was a long-time board member of Wal Mart-the bete noir of liberals. Howard Dean is the Park Avenue triplex-raised, private-school-educated beneficiary of the Dean Witter fortune. John Kerry is a serial gold-digger who has an obsession with marrying wealthy women.

There are a number of Democrats who have earned fortunes on the basis of their own efforts. John Corzine, formerly of Goldman Sachs, used his immense Wall Street fortune to finance his Senate seat election campaign, and now plans to use even more of his millions, by the score, to win his state’s governorship. Frank Lautenberg, the other New Jersey Senator, is also loaded. He was the founder of ADP, which - gasp! – has been outsourcing data processing jobs from corporations for decades now. And don't forget Herb Kohl from Wisconsin, with a retailing fortune of his own, building up family-owned grocery stores, and starting Kohl’s Department Stores, only to sell it in 1979, and seeing it become a major retailing success story. A wealthy investor since then, he owns the Milwaukee Bucs basketball team. Like President Bush, Senator Kohl sports a Harvard Business School MBA. If he attended his graduation exercises in Harvard Yard, he would have been hissed by the diploma-winners from the other Harvard faculties, as is traditional in Cambridge. All of these Democrats used hard work and business skill to build legitimate fortunes.

Other Democrats, however, came by their fortunes with less work.

Hillary and Bill Clinton have each made a windfall in the low 8 figures from their books, and the ex-president has doubled his lucre with public speaking fees. The ultimate trust fund baby in the Senate, Jay Rockefeller, sports the name most identified around the world with robber baron predatory capitalism. He is a plutocrat elected from West Virginia. Why isn’t Thomas Frank asking, “What’s wrong with West Virginia?” instead of picking on Kansas? Another trust fund plutocrat is Senator Mark Dayton of Minnesota, whose grandfather built a department store fortune which has morphed into today’s Target Corporation, purveyor of discount urban chic to the masses. Senator Dayton, who is in his late 50s, has a resume unblemished by a private sector job in his entire career.

To be sure, there are a few wealthy Republican office-holders, beginning with President Bush. Perhaps the richest among them is Senator Frist. He inherited his Hospital Corporation of America fortune, but despite his family wealth, which he could have indulged in (as Jay Rockefeller, Teddy Kennedy and Mark Dayton did) as a way to avoid dirty work, he used his time to get his hands dirty in the noblest of professions, enduring years of arduous medical school and becoming a heart surgeon. With no publicity whatsoever, he has for many years traveled at his own expense to Africa to perform heart surgery on patients unable to pay.

One of the founding principles of America is that a man or woman ought to be able rise from humble origins to the pinnacle of power. Look at Harry Truman, for instance: a failed haberdasher who rose to become President. There are any number of other leaders in our history of not just humble origins, but also who experienced repeated failures before their eventual success. These people should become role models to be emulated, not dismissed with condescension and snobbery, as seems to be the current inclination of the Democrats’ leader. This potential of America to be a place to fulfill one's dreams has been a magnet for 300 years of immigrants. It is part of our national character.

A political class drawn from the ranks of those who have ascended on the basis of their own work and talents is far preferable to selecting from those whose background is shuffling papers or cashing checks from a trust fund. Democrats have adopted a Chirac-like attitude towards the common working men and women: shocked that they don't vote the way their social betters direct them. As in the old joke goes, "If I want your opinion, I will give it to you."

It may be a bit of a stretch, but the Democratic Party leadership looks more like the House of Lords and the Republican Party looks more like the House of Commons. Judging by its leadership, one of our political parties can legitimately claim the be the party of the common man and woman. And it isn't the Democrats.

Ed Lasky

You Might Be a Musical Retard

You just might be a musical retard if you do not have the following albums in your collection:

Son Volt - Trace

Wilco - Summerteeth

Whiskeytown - Strangers Almanac

Neko Case - Blacklisted

Uncle Tupelo - No Depression

The Tragically Hip - Trouble at the Henhouse

Old 97's - Too Far Too Care

So misunderstood..

Please.. pick which one is worse:

1. People who completely do not understand you, or
2. People who *think* they understand you and are completely off-base

In the history of misunderstood people, I think I have been at the core of misunderstanding more than anyone else in the history of modern man. Maybe that is a slight exaggeration, but that is sure how I feel at times.

What frustrates me even more is when those in group two (above) still refuse to understand you because they have a preconceived notion based on their previous misunderstanding.

To anyone who may care, I am very easy to understand:

A. I say exactly what is on my mind.
B. I respect people who work hard.
C. I have little patience for fools.

Remember those three items and the rest is easy.

The Hunt Is On

Today, Randall, Terry and I were driven around by a real estate broker in our quest for the perfect office space. Our 1500 sqare foots are getting pretty tight and the open office is still driving me nuts. So our "perfect office" consists of private office space for the Roundtable development team and the rest open office so the S.O.S. guys can live it up like they are on Bourbon Street.

Of the six that we toured, I liked the first one best. And (believe it or not) it is directly across the street from our favorite karaoke watering hole, Durty Nellys. Not that it has any bearing on my opinion, but I did think it was quite the coincidence. It is upstairs and has a loft-like look and feel. There is a courtyard in the middle and a big skylight which allows natural light to flow into the office. None of the other offices we looked at did much for me. However, there is still a long way to go in our hunt. Moving to a new office is always exciting and I am looking forward finding a new "home". If I am going to spend 50+ hours per week in a room, I damn sure want to be comfortable.

The beard is coming along nicely. I've decided to trim it occasionally instead of letting it just grow into a big bush. I think Jaclyn secretly likes it. In face, she has taken to calling me 'furry' instead of the usual 'fuzzy'. Of course Lori does not care for it (she is not a face hair girl). I think that she prefers her guys not to be "too manly". Hell, I feel like I should be starring in the next "Lord of the Rings" movie with this thing.

Well, it is almost 9:00pm. That means I should write some pre-bedtime code.

Random Insanity..

Ahhh.. the human race. The societal debris that roams our city streets (and occasionally vote) are an endless supply of entertainment for budget-minded citizens.

When Jaclyn was in college, she worked at Stater Brothers (it's a grocery store). She was once asked: "Why don't you have any potoatoes that aren't dirty?".

Saturday night, there was a wreck on the PCH. The police blocked off northbound lanes and diverted us into the neighboring community. I heard some dumb ass girl yell out to the cop: "Why in the world would you put a roadblock on PCH on a Saturday night?".

The other day, I was leaving the gym and overheard a white-trash woman on her cell phone in the parking lot: "NO, I AM NOT A SUCKER! I AM JUST LETTING HIM STAY WITH ME UNTIL HE GETS A JOB!".

A drunkard white couple live next door to me. My neighbor across the courtyard is an Indian (eastern). Once, his grandchildren were playing in the swimming pool. The she-drunkard yelled from her patio: "Hey! No niggers are allowed in the pool!".

Have you ever heard Robert Byrd (D - West VA) speak? He once uttered on Fox News with Tony Snow: "There are white niggers. I've seen a lot of white niggers in my time. I'm going to use that word. We just need to work together to make our country a better country, and I'd just as soon quit talking about it so much." I bet you never heard that one, huh? Psssst.. he's a Democrat. It's ok. Besides, he doesn't want his money back.. he wants his money's worth!

I'm Not a Dead Man...

.. I just play one at work.

Airport BLOG

I am currently sitting in the Orlando airport awaiting my flight back to LAX. Boy, isn't technology something? In my best Huel Howser voicer.. "how about that?!".

Exchange turned out to be rather productive:

1. My presentation was not a total disaster
2. We got lots of good leads at the Expo
3. I got to attend several good break-out sessions
4. The 'directions' and 'alliance partner' meetings were productive
5. Everyone who saw our Roundtable/Eclipse integration was very excited

Obviously there is still lots of work to be done, but we have a good start. Kudos to Good Doug for his great help thus far on the project.

Dig it.

Exchange

Well, here I am sitting in my overpriced room at the Walt Disney Dolphin Resort. Why Progress insists on having Exchange at places like this I do not know. Perhaps they assume that it must be located in a "vacation area" so that users will feel more compelled to show up. Yeah, right.. sounds good. I bet all the spouses jump at the chance to go on an "Exchange vacation" with their husband or wife.

Whatever the reason is for having it here, users are not showing up. Attendance seems to be frightfully low this year. I am only basing this on the size of the crowd at the welcome reception so there may be more people that just have not shown their faces yet.

Randall and I practiced our presentation yesterday and finished in about 40 minutes. Uh oh.. 10 minutes short. I suppose that I am going to have to talk slower to fill in the remaining time. Hopefully, there will be some questions asked which will slow down the pace a little bit.

I should go poke my head into the general session so I can hear PSC tell us how wonderful they are.

There Are No Good Democrats

Today, a Democrat co-worker made the following comment about someone because they discovered that this someone was a Republican. Now bear in mind that when this person's political leanings were not not known, the Democrat had nothing but good things to say about the aforementioned Republican.

"(insert name here) is a Republican? Well, bless his pointy head."

Pulling from my limited knowledge pool of linguistics and general discourse, I consider the previous adjective as one of disparaging nature.

The 4 common traits of every (no)good Democrat:

1. A Democrat never passes up on a opportunity to tell you what they think.
2. A Democrat is one of the most closed-minded persons you will ever meet.
3. A Democrat will hurl insults at Republicans just because they are Republicans.
4. A Democrat is only happy when everyone else is miserable.

I am not much of fan of the Republican party either. Republicans have moved so far to the left of center that I would think the Dems would be throwing a (grand 'ol) party. Instead, the Dems keep moving even further and further to the left just to maintain that consistent level of separation. In the meantime, us Republitarians are left without a voice except our own.

Coke machine glow

I am tired. I should go to bed.

This Saturday, I am leaving for Orlando to attend the annual Progress User Conference. We have a very busy schedule. Between meetings, presentations and the Expo I do not think I will have much free time. That's ok. I suppose it makes the days pass more quickly.

On Mondy I am hosting a breakout session on managing/deploying database schema using Roundtable. Immediately after, the Expo begins. Randall and I get to stand at our podium in the Progress pavillion for 3.5 hours meeting current and prospective customers and fielding any questions they may have. It's usually fun and I've gotten much better at it over the years. We are not giving out t-shirts this year though. Instead, visitors will walk away with a Roundtable evalution CD which includes the new QuickStart Guide and Data. Oh boy... doesn't that make you go into convulsions of excitement?

Sigh.. enough of my rambling. I feel like I am in some kind of daze hardly knowing what day it is anymore.

Jaclyn is leaving for Washington in the morning and I have to get up at the crack-of-ass to drive her to the airport. So, I should go to bed. Now.